“I wish I had done that.”
“I didn’t mean to do that.”
“Maybe I was rude to them?”
“I didn’t realise that what I did was that bad.”
“Is this a cultural difference?”
Everyone has had these experiences, haven’t they?
I myself recently felt that I had forgotten something crucial in my own teaching of international protocol and etiquette.
I felt that during the years of the COVID disaster, my mind had been distracted from the ‘human connection’ that is truly precious to us as human beings.
Protocol is a very simple communication technique, a kind of networking rope that connects people. At the root of this is ‘manners’, which is ‘consideration’. So there is an inseparable relationship between the two.
Remembering this, I first decided to take a fresh look at the courtesy I show to those around me, especially my family. In doing so, I experienced a gradual bridging of the bonds and rifts that had previously separated us.
In this article, from the perspective of an international protocol and etiquette expert, I will discuss the reality and true meaning of international protocol and etiquette, and how it can be applied to your personal life, including the relevance of etiquette and protocol to your personal life.
The more you stumble through life, the more you want to think about manners What exactly is international etiquette and protocol? What do you need to know about it, when do you use it and how does it affect you?
When people make a mistake in etiquette, some say they’ll be more careful next time, while others say they’ll pretend it didn’t happen.
Think about this for a moment. What do you think people need when they are on the edge?
It is people.
On Earth, where people share the same planet and live together, nothing is more important and virtuous than smooth human relations.
Etiquette and protocol play an important role in building these relationships.
However, although international etiquette and protocol are essential in today’s international society, few people are aware of their importance, and most people realise their importance only after making mistakes.
Comparing Japan with the rest of the world, it is true that the average level of awareness of etiquette in the world is different. There are many values in the world, and they respect each other, so it is natural that they are different from the world view of Japanese people, who are expected to behave in a narrow, socially defined way.
However, the basics of etiquette that are part of the Japanese psyche can be very useful in such a global society, both to facilitate diplomacy and to improve one’s personal life and outlook on life.
Why do people feel they don’t need to bother learning etiquette? A very simple question: “What is etiquette? Have you ever thought about it?
When people hear the word etiquette, they often interpret it as a set of rules they have to follow, or that if they don’t, they are considered rude, or that they shouldn’t bother people around them.
Many business people may also think that etiquette is less important than other hard skills, that there is no need to learn it, that it can be put off until later, and that what is more important is how to make more profit.
However, this kind of thinking makes it difficult to persuade people to put etiquette into practice and prevents smooth communication. In fact, etiquette is essential for building relationships in both business and personal life, so it is not something to be put off, but the sense of obligation to do so can make people feel that it is a waste of time.
People may also feel that etiquette is just a boring rule, so there is no need to do it if they have different values. Some people may act in a selfish way as long as they are cordial, do not take offence, or if they think it is a good idea.
In essence, etiquette is an act of courtesy, and courtesy is an act of showing ‘consideration’ to others. No matter how you feel, if the other person does not feel comfortable, it is meaningless.
People today are probably preoccupied with their own affairs and do not feel the need to learn etiquette.
For example, in Japanese education, morality is a compulsory subject and people learn about morality and etiquette until they are teenagers. Japan is said to be the most polite and well-mannered country in the world. And as far as I can see, more people are willing to learn etiquette than in other countries.
However, there are still many busy modern people who think that learning etiquette is not important and that they can do without it. In fact, when they enter the working world, they forget the etiquette they learned as children.
What is the point of learning etiquette? If there is really no need to learn things like etiquette, why are there so many etiquette schools in the world and why do people study them?
Are people who study etiquette special? Or are they people with a lot of time on their hands and no time to spare? Is it unnecessary for busy business people?
Not really, is it?
People learn etiquette not just because they want to, but because they know it will benefit them. The more successful people know how important it is.
People who learn etiquette know that compassion alone is not enough to behave properly, and that mistakes can lead to misunderstandings. They know that being considerate is quite natural and that it is not easy to understand how to behave unless you learn it.
Based on the science of human behaviour, the reason why people are unable to be honest and kind to those close to them, or to apologise to those below them, or to admit their mistakes and apologise, is because of their deep psychological need to be superior to the other person. They are afraid to be polite because they fear that by being polite to the other person they will not be able to gain an advantage over them.
In business, too, when problems arise, they are often caused by simple manners. This happens when profit takes precedence over people’s feelings.
So if you want to be polite, but you don’t know how to be polite, and in the end you can’t be polite, you won’t make a good impression on the other person.
If you know how to behave comfortably in these situations, you can act confidently without hesitation and gain a great deal of trust as a person. When you gain confidence as a person, people will be more willing to help you in different situations.
People who know that being kind to others will come back to them, learn etiquette and are concerned with beautiful behaviour and ways of thinking.
Is international etiquette the same all over the world? Let’s take the example of Japan, also known as the land of politeness.
In Japan, if you ask the question, “What is etiquette? 10 out of 10 people will answer in the following way.
It’s behaving in a way that doesn’t cause trouble for others.
So is this idea universal?
Japanese people think it is a universal value, but it is a very Japanese way of thinking.
In India, for instance, which is also in Asia, it is considered polite to be disturbed.
In Asia there is the concept of ‘annoyance’, but in the West there are often situations where people are not as annoyed by people’s behaviour as Asians are, for example when people ask them to do something. Rather, there are situations where people feel that not doing something is rude.
These are the different values of etiquette due to cultural differences.
However, most people are not aware of this difference in etiquette values due to cultural differences. When this difference is opened up as a difference in values and culture, it can lead to terrible interpersonal problems.
Different countries and cultures have different manners and feelings. By imitating each other’s good feelings, a good image can be created.
International etiquette is not universal etiquette.
What is international protocol? What is International Protocol?
International protocol is a useful way of learning about international etiquette.
Certainly, protocol is a set of rules that are in place to facilitate communication between large organisations. However, at the heart of it all is the spirit of good manners.
If you follow these rules, you can express a form of politeness, and if you put your feelings into it, they will show in your words and facial expressions.
Unlike unnatural behaviour, where you are just trying to convey your feelings without knowing why, if you follow these rules you will behave in a dignified, reliable manner and put the other person at ease.
International protocol involves learning the cultural characteristics of each country and then behaving accordingly in all situations.
It is a protocol that different cultures agree to follow with each other, so it is said to be an essential knowledge and preference in intercultural communication, as it gives you an idea of what you can do to satisfy the other country in intercultural exchanges.
Who can benefit from learning international protocol? The people who can directly benefit from learning international protocol are, of course, those involved in diplomacy. Also known as diplomatic protocol, it is now an essential skill for diplomats.
It is essential for politicians, diplomats, global business executives, embassy officials, people working for global companies and organisations, etc.
And diplomacy is not just about political relations, it is also about business exchanges between companies, exchanges between travellers, exchanges between international students, cross-cultural exchanges between neighbours – all of this is ‘diplomacy’. Even within the same country, different regions have different cultures, and Japan is no different. Dealing with people from different regions is also ‘diplomacy’.
In this way, everyone in the world can be said to be involved in diplomacy, so it is useful for everyone to know at least the basics.
Protocol is like the rope that binds people together, so in the end it is a knowledge and a taste that is very useful for modern working people.
What are the benefits of learning international etiquette and protocol? International etiquette and protocol are essential skills and tastes for living in today’s modern global society, and learning them can help you improve yourself, feel more confident, build relationships and get things done.
The benefits are summarised below.
Improved communication: You will be able to communicate more effectively, avoid misunderstandings and build better relationships with people from different backgrounds.
Increased cultural sensitivity: By becoming familiar with the etiquette and protocol of different countries, you will be more likely to respect their cultural values and build trusting relationships with people from other countries.
Increased networking opportunities: familiarity with international etiquette can help you make a good impression at networking events and business meetings, which can lead to new contacts and opportunities.
Increased self-confidence: knowing how to behave appropriately in different cultural contexts can boost your confidence and help you deal with unfamiliar situations more smoothly.
Global business success: for business professionals, understanding international etiquette and protocol can help when negotiating deals and forming partnerships, enabling them to work more effectively with clients and colleagues around the world.
Personal growth: learning about the customs and traditions of other cultures can broaden your horizons, increase your empathy and give you a deeper understanding of humanity.
Enhance travel: knowing local etiquette when travelling can enrich your experience by enabling you to relate better to locals and understand their customs.
Conflict resolution: Understanding the nuances of different cultural norms can help you deal with conflicts and misunderstandings in a more sensitive and informed way.
Improving diplomacy: For diplomats and government officials, knowledge of international etiquette and protocol is essential to maintaining good relations between countries and promoting peace and cooperation. In an increasingly globalised world, the time to learn is now.
The InterCultural Protocol Academy of Japan, a school specialising in international protocol where both East and West can be studied, looks forward to welcoming you to experience our programmes.
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